Der Nerdery

I was thinking about all you poor people out there who refuse to read the Harry Potter books, yet will sit down and watch the movies. You miss so much that way that I thought I should let you know what you are missing. This post will be on the first book and movie of Harry Potter and the Sorcerers Stone. I will be telling you the Differences form the book point of view to the movie as the Book is the original. OK here I go…

First off Professor MC. Gonagall has black Hair not salt and pepper like in the movie, and wears very square glasses not round. MC. Gonagall, Hagred and Dumador talk for some length before leaving Harry with the Derslys, not just dumping him off like luggage. At duddlys Birthday harry had to cook bacon for his Birthday not ham and they could not eat at the table, that is where they put all the gifts. In the movie they had them on the counter and they ate at the table.

Harry’s eyes are green in the book and brown in the movie. Harry was supposed to be left at a babysitters not go to the Zoo a last minute change and Harry had to go also.

Dudly has a friend “Piers,” he also goes to the Zoo with them.
Now to the famous snake scene. Yes, Harry talks to the snake. however Dudlly and Piers fall into the tank when the glass dissipates. The snake says Thanksss, amigo not just thanksss and the glass never reappears trapping them in there.

The letter that came from Hogwarts was addressed in emerald green ink and Harry had it out of the envelope when it was taken away he just had not had time to unfold it and read it yet. It was after they received that first letter addressed to the cupboard under the stair that they decided to move harry to dudlys spare bedroom. The next letters were addressed to The Smallest Room. The third day Uncle Vernin slept on the doorstep to make sure Harry did not get to the letters before he did. Saturday they found twenty-four letters rolled inside of the eggs that were delivered that day. Sunday they went to a hotel where more letters were delivered. Monday was the day that Hagred showed up. When Hagred came knocking at the door he only knocked twice before the door fell in, not three times. Harry never hides from Hagred he findes him right away he never mistook Dudly for Harry. The gun that Vernin had, Hagred took it away, tied it in a knot and tossed it into the corner of the room, not just bending it up and the gun was never fired. The cake that Hagred brought for Harrys birthday was not misspelled. When Hagred lit the fire in the fire place he had his back to them they did not see him light it. After Hagred lights the fire he pulls sausages from his pocket and proceeds to cook them on the fire. Hagred’s umbrella is pink, and a bright pink at that. Dudlly gets the pigs tail when Vernin insults Dumbledore not when he eats the cake. Dudley never touches the cake.

Qurril shakes Harry’s hand at the leaky cauldron, he does not avoid it like it shows in the movie. To get to Diagon Ally, Hagred taps one brick three times not multipule bricks once. Gringotts is a snowey white building with burnished bronze doors. Vault door 713 dissapers completely not unlocking when the goblin touches it. Harry went into the Owl shop with Hagrid to get Hedwig. Harry tried many wands before finding one that worked. The wands that were not right did not explode anything they did nothing. When Harry had the right wand it shot red sparks out of it. Harry first met Malfoy at the robe shop in Diagon Ally.

When Hagred and Harry where done shoping they went back to the Dersily’s for another month before going to Hogwarts. Harry meats Ron like the movie says but Ron allready has Scabers. They did eat chocolate frogs on the train but none jumped away in fact no jumping was ever mentioned. Harry again meets Draco on the train, in the movie it was not till later that he meets him. Professer McGonicle does not put the sorting hat on the kids they do that themselves. A student named Hannah Abbot was the first to put the hat on not Hermonie. Dumbalore’s welcoming speech goes as follows “nitwit, blubber, oddment, tweek.” Dumbadore gave the speach, they had him say it first in the movie before supper not after. Then they sing the School song pg.128 if you are interested in looking it up. It’s too long to put on here.

You also get to meet Peeves the Poltrigist, who is never mentioned in the movie at all.
The fat lady in the portrait is wearing a pink dress in the book. The class History of Magic is taught by a ghost. Nevil gives himself boils in potions class. Harry reads the news about the break-in at Gringots in the News paper at Hagreds hut, not at mail call.

The rememberal is the size of a large marble not a tennis ball like it was shown in the movie. Nevil did break his wrist when he fell off his broom in flying class.  He actually broke his wrist when he was 20ft in the air, he did not do any crazy stunts or get caught by anything on the way down. Malfoy said that he would leave the remembral up a tree not on the roof. When Harry caught the remembral he was about a foot from hitting the ground, not right in front of a window. Malfoy challenged Harry to a duel but he never shows, instead he sent Filtch after him trying to get Harry into trouble. It is while running from Flilch that they discover the forbidden corridor (not a room). They desover Fluffy in the corridore.

Six owls had to carry in Harry’s Nimbus 2000 not just Hedwig. On Halloween they had live bats flying in the great hall. Harry and Ron acually locate the Troll in the girls bathroom, not realizing that is the one Hermonie is in they lock it. They hear Hermoni screaming and they go in to help her. Harry was hanging onto the Trolls neck the whole time and he was never dangling by one leg.

During the first Quiditch match no one was knocked out. The Weasly twins did try to help Harry onto their brooms, when his started to go crazy, but they could not get close enough to him. Hermoni knocked over Querril trying to get to Snape. She set Snape’s robes on fire with a blue fire. Hermoni then put the blue fire into a jar then her pocket when everyone started to freak out. Harry was the only Seeker after the snitch when he caught it in his mouth.

Wizards chess pieces talk to the players. The Invisibility cloak is silvery gray. When Harry looks into the Mirror of Ersied he sees his entire family not just his Mom and Dad (Aunts, Uncles and Cousins ). Harry took Ron to see the mirror the next night not the same night. The Invisibility cloak also has a hood like a proper cloak should.

Malfoy stuck Nevels legs together with a leg locker curse, he torments Nevel a lot in the book. Harry found Nickolas Famels name on the back of a chocolate frog card, and that reminded Hermonie that she had the book. Harry heard Snape and Querril arguing in the forest not in the caste. Hagred put his Dragon egg directly into the fire not in a kettle above the fire. It took days for the dragon egg to hatch after the kids found out about it. Hagred ended up having Norbert for weeks after he hatched. Harry and Hermonie and Ron convinced Hagred to send Norbert to Charlie in Romania. Harry, Hermonie and Nevel were caught out after sending Norbert to Romania. Ron was not there and did not receive detention.

The party going into the forbidden forest was Hagred, Hermoni and Harry.
The other party was Malfoy, Nevel and Fang. They switched Harry and Nevil halfway through, becuse Malfoy would not stop scaring Nevil. Firenze a palomino cenatar rescued Harry from the cloaked figure. Harry was allowed to ride him back to Hagred.

When they went back to the forbidden corridor Fluffy was already awake. There was a harp there in the corridor but it was not playing. Harry played a flute that Hagrad had gave him. When they hit the devils snare Hermonie was not caught and she used a spell to get them both out, there was no relaxing to get out.

In the key room all the kids went after the keys, no keys chased them. The keys had colorful wings like birds not clear wings like bugs. The key they needed had blue wings. The chess pieces did not have faces. Ron got to choose what pieces they where going to play as. When they won, the white king took off his crown and threw it at Harry. The next room had a troll in it and the troll was already knocked out. The next room had potions on a table Hermoni helped Harry pick one and then went back to get help for Ron. Quirril tied Harry up with rope. Quirril could not touch Harry’s skin or it burned not just when Harry touched him. Voldemort never passed through Harry.

Again, these are just my observations I want in no way to put down the movies. I think that the movies were very well done and I realize that they only had so much time to work with. This is for those out there who refuse to read the books. I am hoping that this will show you the differences enough that you will want to go read them yourselves. I have left some of the minor differences out, feel free to post your comments below when you find them.

Last weekend, I was bored. Bored of Halo: Reach, bored of Castlevania: Symphony of the Night. I was even bored of the internet. I started browsing instant watch movies on Netflix, when I saw a jewel long lost from my childhood:

Toxic Crusaders: The Movie.

Well, actually, no. Ignore what the picture shows. And it’s not really a movie. Toxic Crusaders was a cartoon released in the mid-90s. It is a spinoff of a cult “classic” series called Toxic Avenger. If you have never heard of these films, you make me dissapoint. Actually, I am jealous of you. The studio that made Toxic Avenger, Troma Inc.,  is the king of dog shit movies. Yes yes, I am glad there is at least one guerrilla movie studio who doesn’t follow the traditions or regulations of the film industry. Believe me: it shows. Excessive violence, nudity, and enough cheese to drown Wisconsin. I really have no problem with Toxic Avenger or its many…interesting…. sequels. It’s supposed to be corny. However, every Troma film seems to want to live up to Toxic Avenger, making most (if not all) their movies in the category of most 2d fighters that came after Street Fighter, commonly known as Me-Toos.

So I digressed. Toxic Crusaders is a PG spin-off of said movie series. How much of a spin-off? Well, like Me-Toos, Toxic Crusaders tried to capitalize on the kick of other series of 1991 concerning the environment and super mutants. Maybe you heard of the other shows like Captain Planet and Zen: Intergalactic Ninja? Or maybe their biggest inspiration: Teenage Mutant Something Somethings.  Actaully Zen: Interg’l Ninja was a video game and a comic book. Maybe MC Kids on the Sega Genesis? No? Was I the only one?!

Anyway, this uber nerd named Melvin Junko who gets dipped in toxic waste and becomes Toxie: a hideously deformed creature of superhuman size and strength. He then confronts this alien pollutant villain named Dr. Killemoff. Along the way, Toxie enlists of other hideously deformed creatures of superhuman size and strength Major Disaster, Nozone, Junkyard, and Headbanger. The show had 13 episodes, three or so of which have been pasted together as a movie on Netflix, and never really found a spot on Fox or syndication.

This is where the nerding happens. I remember this cartoon. To be honest, this cartoon affected a lot of my character design then and even now. Yes, it’s a dumbed down version of a terrible movie BUT the designs were amazing for a prepubescent kid like me. Even better: Playmates, the designers for those Adolescent Abomination Anthropomorphic Amphibians (I was afraid I wasn’t going to keep that one rolling) made the toys. I even recall wanting these toys, as a sort of poor-man’s Turtles action figures.

As I watched the “movie,” I realized just how marketed this cartoon was to the toys. Seeing vehicles, I thought: yep, those became toys. I saw the disposable henchmen and thought yep, those are action figures. If you really go back and watch any cartoons of this formula (most super hero action cartoons, honestly) you will see what they wanted as toys and what they were pushing was revenue from toys, along with cereals and other merchandise. Hell’s Bells: they even had video games from Bandai (makers of notoriously games of obscure and random franchises) and  the Me-Too Sega Genesis.

I actually rented this game from a Hastings. It was… well… I have played better. A lot better. It wasn’t quite TMNT: The Arcade game, nor was it Final Fight or Streets of Rage or even Treasure Troll’s Treasure Island or Pretty Princess Dress-Me-Up. Jerky controls, terrible hit detection, no bump mapping or browning or bloom. Dog. Shit. Tacos. The music was actually okay from what I remember the music was dog shit tacos as well I am torn on this subject after going to Youtube.

Collectively, this series tried really hard to be a poor man’s TMNT. Mutants, dumb villains, and merchandise. Watching it now, I was able to see the undertones and what they were peddling. As an animator… I was butthurt. I could see where they took shortcuts, and where they made embarrassing animation boo-boos (wrong characters doing dialogue). I feel like they had a very finite budget and they couldn’t waste too much time on the inbetweens to make it quality. Some of the writing was chuckle-worthy, but most are definitive Derp jokes (jokes you can see coming from space, see: any Rob Schneider movie). One character, Psycho, pretty much gives you a rundown on what is going to happen at the episode’s climax. I thought that was clever. Oh, and get used to hearing “hideously deformed creature of superhuman size and strength.” They try to say it at least twice an episode, if not more.

So my childhood may have been mislead, but if you want some nostalgia from a cartoon that just couldn’t make it or if you can’t find your Ninja Turtle collection, I would recommend this series…sort of.

Two donkeys of five.

Fullmetal Alchemist
Nerdy rating 9/10
Episodes: 51

Release date: 1993

US Distribution: funimation
Author: Arakawa Hiromu
Design: Aramaki Shinji, Ishigaki Junya, Ito Yoshiyuki
Music: Mitsuma Masafumi, Oshima Michiru
Script: Aikawa Sho

This is the first anime I ever watched and realized it was an anime. I had watched others before but did not realize what they were. Fullmetal Alchemist is responsible for my current anime addiction. Fullmetal starts out with two brothers Edward Elric and Alphonse Elric. The Elric brothers mother has died and they don’t know where there Father is being the young alchemists that they are decide to bring their mother back with the power of alchemy. The act of using alchemy to bring people back from the dead is forbidden and with good reason. The alchemy recoils on the brothers and takes Alphonse entirely and takes Edwards leg. Edward is a moment of desperation offers himself for his brother’s soul. Edward just loses his arm for his brother’s soul. Desperately, Edward attaches the soul of Alphonse to a handy set of armor in the corner of the room.

To make a long story short Edward has lost an arm and a leg and Alphonse his entire body only his soul in a suit of armor is left. Edward has made a mechanical arm and leg so he can travel freely, and decides to join the State Alchemists to look for the Philosopher’s stone. The state is the one who gives him the name of the Fullmetal Alchemist. The Philosopher’s stone is a stone said to contain powers and any alchemist can use the stone to ignore the alchemist’s rules. Which is 1: Equivalent Exchange. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost.
#2: human transmutation. You must never try to resurrect the dead. This is a taboo that must never be broken (taboo is a prohibition if you didn’t know).
With this knowledge they set off to find the fabled stone and recover there bodies, on the way they must battle other alchemists and Homunculi (the end result of Human transmutation.) The anime ends ok but there is a movie after called Fullmetal Alchemist Conqueror of Shamballa I would deffinatly watch this movie since it wraps up the anime well.

Nerd Rating:10/10

The Sorcerer’s Apprentice was a nerds dream come true it starts out with a Buzz Light year alarm clock, and it just gets better from there. They could not have made Dave anymore of a nerd. A true nerd had definitely had a hand in making this movie. With the reference to star wars and the MTG poster on the wall, yes only a nerd would notice that.The movie has everything You could ever want from high speed car chases, sword fights, cool Gadgets, magic, flying metal eagles, dragons, explosions, Nicolas Cage in a leather duster…sigh. what more can a girl ask for? Jay Baruchel is pretty cute himself (in a geeky way). For u guys don’t worry there is two good looking woman for you Teresa Palmer and Monica Bellucci. The effects were mind blowing I have never seen magic portrayed so well before, Disney knows how to do it. The movie keeps your full attention for the entire film so do everything Before u go to see it, I would recommend this movie to everyone, because If you are a nerd or not u will still love this movie. I personally Can’t wait to go see the movie again.

SPOILER ALERT!!!!!
If u don’t want to hear about my favorite parts of the movie don’t
Continue to read……

I warned you….

I love it when they changed their cars to sport cars. I really Wish I had that talent. It would come in handy when I’m late for work especially when they drove a car through one, and to get out they had to drive back through their reflection, of course the only reflection was a piece of glass that was falling and they had to drive through before it broke. The persian sinking rug was awesome just think u have a unwelcome guest… not anymore the rug just swallowed them. Tesla coils anyone? what isn’t nerdy about that but oh so cool at the same time expesually when he can make them play music. The loved the part in the movie when he tries to explain his behavior to Becky and explains away his odd behavior at the age of ten with a glucose imbalance it just cracked me up. glucose imbalance really? like I haven’t heard that one before. Ok so maybe I haven’t which is why I love it so much I’ve never heard or seen anything like this in the movies in a very long time. the fact that all the good guys made it out of the movie alive was refreshing.

Out of all of the movies in my collection, Tokyo Zombie is probably in my top 3. I was really lucky to find it at a buy-sell-trade store I visited often. While shuffling through a movie bargain bin, the front cover caught my eye. Read the rest of this entry →