Der Nerdery

Do you like shootin’ games? Do you like hording games? Do you like DLC as well?

Then you will like Borderlands. Let me explain why, before I actually discuss the game mechanics.

1) The game has been out for over a year now. I have been playing it since then.  The age of the game means it will be in the discounted sections at your local vidya game store.  I scored my copy and the subsequent dlc’s for $60, which is about what it would have bought to score it new or to to buy the Game of the Year edition equally new. Either way, you get what you want for a nice penny.

2) Multiplayer. You can play with your kill stealing, loot mongling, do-my-own-thing friends (well, three of them anyway) in a very nice world where 12 yr olds won’t belittle you about being a noob and won’t be confused when you start talking about blast processing. I digress. Playing with close friends. Good.

3) The nerd references. Yes, this game is littered with them. Because there are almost a million “unique” weapons in the game, the designers went a little wacky. Ghostbusters, Robocop, even TF2. To be honest, the game is even a parody of Fallout, but with Diablo mechanics. There’s even hidden messages in binary, and a nice bragging right to find the hidden fish on every board.

Now, some back story. Borderlands was looking like another me-too post apocalyptic shooter until they drastically overhauled the game to look more concept-art in appearance. Unfortunately, the story was sacrificed for with this endeavor ( the game was 90% done when they decided to redo it) and the lead artist left (you can see her pictures in the game as a missing person). The DLC covers up the lack of main game story tremendously.

What was that about a million guns? Oh yeah. There are a lot of guns. Before you have a joygasm, you should know: the guns aren’t really aesthetically different from others of the same. Shotguns look like other shotguns of the same brands, minus a few or add a few things. But their individual stats are very different.  Is this some sort of cheap marketing ploy? Maybe. You’ll find yourself rationalizing why to get rid of a pistol that does 200 damage and another that does 200 but has a scope. Plus, nerd references abound with their names.

I’m getting windy, so let me go through the DLCs:

Dr. Ned’s Zombie Island – zombies, zombies, shotguns. Repeat.  Worth it, but the story is pretty transparent.
Moxxie’s Underdome Riot- it’s a shameful introduction of a character for another DLC, and a bank…and an arena. Worth it for the bank.
General Knoxx’s Secret Armory: This is the bread and butter of the DLCs. Enjoy driving, cuz there’s a lot of it.
Clap-Trap (sic)’s Robot Revolution: This beats General Knoxx with his own dismembered arm. But it was shooooorrt.

Also, Gearbox has said twice now that they are done making DLCs and updates for the game. Then again, they lied the first time they told us this.

Still not satisfied? The game is easy to modify. Yes. You can modify your equipment to have an infinite shield or Deux Ex Machina of a weapon. Do I condone this? No. But I’ve seen some people make some insane mods. So whatevs.

How many donkeys does this show get? There could have been a better main story, there could be better enemy AI, and there could have been more missions in some of the DLCs…but I give it Three and a calf/Five Guatemalan Pack Mules. So I guess that means you should try it.

There were no crowds queueing Time Square waiting for some midnight release,  not much media coverage, but a major step in video game consoles was released today.  This black sheep of the gaming community is known as OnLive, and it’s console is simply called the “MicroConsole”.  If you have never heard of OnLive or it’s console you may wonder what makes it so special.  It has no fancy or expensive hardware, no opening ports for game disks nor cartridges.

The how does it work?  The magic power of the Internet.  The hardware and games are hosted in a server farm by OnLive and a stream of the game is broadcast like a television signal to your computer or the console.

The service officially started June 15th of this year for PCs and Macs with some of the best AAA and indie games of the year.

I happen to get one of the first shipments of the MicroConsole and spent the day playing and testing it out.  It works just as well as it did on my PC with no major problems.  Although it does not come with a wireless adapter yet, I manage to bridge my netbook to  act as wireless adapter and it works perfectly.

It comes with one wireless controller, which is a variation of an Xbox 360, where the D-pad and left thumb stick are  switched and a row of video controls for brag clip and in the future for when they release movies or possibly Netflix on the system.

The MicroConsole has the ability to connect up to four OnLive wireless controllers and two USB ports that work easily with any Xbox 360 controller(wireless if you have an adapter)  Also there is the ability to hook up a usb keyboard and mouse if your a die hard PC gamer.  It even worked with my Razer Naga, even though only the 3 main mouse buttons worked.

OnLive has some downsides and an unfair share of criticism. The service requires at least a stable 3Mbps internet connection for uninterrupted gameplay.  The game selection is slim, made worse by the fact a deal with EA games went sour.  The worst is an image problem that OnLive  was a scam and it wasn’t technically possible long before the service came out.  This negative image lead the company to believe that it could not survive without a charging a monthly service fee that added to the problems.

However with a successful launch that help dropped the monthly fee and delivering almost everything they promised is making the image problems go away.

The OnLive Micro-Console is available at their website for $99 including a free game.  There is no retail option, and no option to buy extra controllers and as mentioned above no wireless adapter yet.

Also announced this week is a Playpack Pass, a $10 monthly fee that lets you play all you want for a select number of older games.  They are hoping to release more games for that service to a total of 40 games by the end of January.  All Micro-console owners have free access to this service until January 14.

Of course OnLive is free to sign up for any try out on your PC or Mac and every game lets you play the first 30 minutes absolutely free.

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(My OnLive MicroConsole)

At 2:17 pm on December 6th, 1992, a new type of bomb exploded over the metropolitan area of Japan…”

If you know what this is from, you know what the new type of bomb was. Afterwards,  World War 3 ensued and Neo-Tokyo had to rebuild itself on a man-made island in the Tokyo Bay.

What I love about Akira is how Katsuhiro Otomo basically pioneered the use of unusual angles and incredibly detailed cityscapes and backgrounds in his manga. Yeah, dude. This was the guy that STARTED that.

In Akira, he constructs a world where political corruption and government inadequacy play a role in the destruction of Tokyo. He also creates a world where children are easily used as pawns in government schemes, no matter the cost. The counter to this threat in the manga is the revolutionary force represented by a girl named Kei and her brother. Their motivations during Volume 1 of the manga are. as of yet, unclear.

Bosozoku gang members Tetsuo Shuma & Shotaro Kaneda get tangled up in Neo-Tokyo’s political corruption when Tetsuo is injured in a motorcycle crash from almost hitting a child that looks like an old man– who also seems to have psychic abilities. This accident somehow awakens psychic abilities in Tetsuo, also, and this peaks the interests of a government organization that is involved somehow with the old-looking child, Takashi.

Compared to the manga, the film was also peak at it’s time of release in 1988. It’s definitely visually stunning. At least, to me! But I live on that hand-drawn, hand-animated stuff. In fact, some have said that Akira was what put anime on the modern-art map, if you will. Otomo used incredibly detailed scenes and unique angles that no one had ever used before in manga or anime.

I thought I was close to the end of the story when reading volume 1 since it follows the movie so well.. but much to my surprise, I found out there actually are FIVE MORE VOLUMES of Akira to go. The movie is DEFINITELY a shortened version of the manga. I can’t imagine what’s in store, and can’t wait to pick up volume 2.. whenever I happen to find it!

I was sitting flipping through channels and landed on Cartoon Network, in which the network was playing movies all day.  So when the next program came on I thought it was another DC comic animated movie.

Let start off by stating, I not a huge fan of DC comics or shows, but have some knowledge ans seen some of the shows.  It wasn’t a movie, but the first episode of “Young Justice”, a new DC comic series that will be on airing in 2011 on Cartoon Network.

The episode starts out with Batman and Robin, Green Arrow and Red Arrow(Speedy), Flash and Kid Flash, and Aquaman and a new hero Aqua Lad heading to the Justice League Headquarter where Robin, Red Arrow, Kid Flash, and Aqua Lad will take the first step to become members of the Justice League.

However Red Arrow becomes quite upset when all they get is membership passes to the Justice League Library and Gym.  He blurts out that he knows about the Justice League Satellite Station and that the Justice League HQ on earth is just for show to the public.  He storms out.  I have a feeling he is going to be a major villian later in the series.

Meanwhile Batman is hailed by Superman and someone else, two different emergencies at the same time, one is a small fire at Project Cadmus that can be handled by the local authorities and the other is more important, so everyone but Robin, Kid Flash, and Aqua Lad leave telling those three to stay put.

The three realize that Red Arrow was partially right and a little upset they were left behind that they decide to go help with the fire.  At the building they see someone go into an elevator which is not suppose to be working in a fire.  They also become aware that the elevator is a specialized high speed elevator in a two story building.

After dropping several stories into a secret xenobiology laboratory(known by the Justice League), they come to find a pod containing a young clone of Superman that was being educated to take down the Justice League.  After freeing the clone, they convince him to join them.  They eventually find the bad guy go to the surface when they have a final show down and get the building to collapse on him.

Afterward the Justice League shows up quite mad, where Aqua Lad, de facto leader of this new team says “accept us or don’t stand in our way”.  Superman comes face to face and his clone (who takes the hero name Superboy) doesn’t know how to handle the situation and flies off.

The four new members are taken to a cave at Mount Justice that were the original headquarters of the Justice League and told they would be trained and take covert missions for the Justice League and the cave was their new headquarters.  Also they met their new team member Miss Martian.

That is where the first episode ended, and from what I saw it was a pretty good story and can’t wait for more episodes in 2011.  They still haven’t introduced the last member of the team Artemis.

I have been neglecting this site.  It is a sad state of affairs.

However, I will start pony promenading my artwork on to this place, as it is highly nerd related. This was also discussed by one of the admins. A discussion I wrote off because either I wasn’t really serious or I wasn’t really serious. I am serious now.

Artwork. Here.

Castle Crashers

Info:

Price: $14.99

Rating: 10/10

Genre: Fighting/Action/RPG

ESRB Rating: Mature

System: PS3/X-Box 360

Players: 1-4

Online Compatible: Yes

Resolution: 1080P

Review:

This game is the best side-scrolling game I have ever played, hands down! I would say it’s a fighting/action/rpg like Gauntlet Legends . As you play the game you gain XP to level, and increase your skills which are strength magic defense and agility. Strength increases how much damage you do. Magic gives you new magical abilities, increases your mana, lengthens your magic distance, and increases magical damage. Defense makes you take less damage and increases your HP. Agility accelerates your movement speed, and how fast you can shoot arrows. The enemies drop  money, items, weapons and animal orbs which help you immensely throughout the game. As you level your character you will gain new moves at certain levels to entertain you throughout the whole game. This game keeps you laughing throughout. If it’s not a crapping deer, a boss jumping in the lava or the ice boss the slowly freezing while screaming in agony after you defeat him.

Animation & Sound:

The graphics of Castle Crashers is just amazing! This game was entirely made by Newgrounds the same developers that made the epic game Alien Hominid!!I love the cartoon style graphics with all the bloody goodness (yes you can turn off the blood, but why would you want too). The music in Castle Crashers is the kind of music you can listen to over and over again. Actually, I go to the Castle Crashers icon on the PS3 all the time just to hear it the song. The game has its own friggin soundtrack for Gods sake! If you have played this game and don’t own the soundtrack you’re a stronger person then I.

If you have ever played this game and have anything to add, please comment!!

Tips & Tricks:

These are just a few tips and tricks I have found though my many hours of playing Castle Crashers.

Infinite Money:

In the desert level where the alien ship beams you up at the end, before you fight a bunch of smaller ships that drop Alien Hominids. Here’s what you need to do, just don’t attack the ships. When you don’t attack the ships they never stop dropping Alien Hominids. Now you just need to get 1P on each side to kill the Alien Hominids as they drop.The great thing about Alien Hominids is that they drop all sorts or gems, coins, bags of gold and food. The player that needs money grabs the loot.

Infinite XP:

In the lava world, you come to a point where you need to eat a sandwich to go any further. The guys you fight there drop them when you slay them to you just don’t eat one. Just camp there to gain all the XP you like. This works best with lower levels. Higher levels can just go to insane mode slay the troll boss at the end of thieves forest . Happy XPing

Story Line Items:

Compass: Find to the left of the blacksmith.

Ship Wheel: At the end of the lava level after defeating the dragons.

Telescope: Grab this item at the end of the Industrial Castle level.

Treasure Map: You’ll receive this after defeating an opposing team at the sand castle, in a game of volleyball.

Useful items:

Boomerang: Equip the Cardinal Animal Orb, and go to the Thief Forest. When you locate the owl pooping from a tree, the cardinal will find the boomerang.

Bow and Arrow: In the Thief Forest level, they are dropped randomly.

Horn: Will receive after killing the Corn boss.

Key Weapon: Equip the Cardinal Animal Orb, and go the Full Moon level. When you reach the mountain path, go up until you reach the second hut, and Cardinal will locate Key Weapon for you.

Spade: Head to the first desert level after you’ve completed the ship level. Leave the ship and find this item right in front of you on the left side of the sand castle.

Unlockable Characters:

Alien Hominid: Have the full game of Alien Hominid HD on your Xbox 360′s HDD and get at least one achievement in it.

Barbarian: Beat King’s Arena.

Bear: Beat the game with Skeleton.

Beekeeper: Beat the game with The Barbarian.

Black Knight: Beat the Game with Grey Knight.

Brute: Beat the game with The Eskimo.

Civilian: Beat the game with Peasant.

Commoner: Beat game with peasant knight.

Eskimo: Complete Icy Arena offline.

Fencer: Beat the game with Mechanic.

Forest Knight: Beat the game with the Thief.

Grey Knight: Defeat the Barbarian Boss.

Mechanic (Gear Knight): Beat the game with Blue Knight.

Ninja: Beat the game with The Red Dragon Knight.

Peasant: Complete the “Peasant Arena”.

Periwinkle Knight: Complete the “Volcano Arena”.

Red Dragon Knight: Beat Game With Orange Knight.

Royal Guard: Complete the game as Green Knight.

Skeleton: Complete the game as Red Knight.

Thief: Beat Thieve’s Arena.

PS3 Only Characters

Open Faced Gray Knight: Complete the Catfish level on Insane Mode

King: Complete the Pipistrello’s Cave level on Insane Mode

Necromancer: Complete the Industrial Castle level on Insane Mode

Cult Minion: Complete the Ice Castle level on Insane Mode

Unlockable Animal Orbs:

Beholder

Power: Provides a magical boost (+2 Magic)

Location: Full Moon

Have Cardinal as your animal in Full Moon, and at the second hut on the mountain path, it’ll give you a golden key that unlocks a cell in the ark holding the Beholder.

BiPolar

Power: Attacks enemies and friends when they’re about to die

Location: Snow World

Use the horn near a sign while walking up a ramp.

Bitey Bat

Power: Bites the enemy’s head

Location: Pipistrello’s Cave

Bitey bat is found after beating the Bat boss.

Burly Bear

Location: Tall Grass Field

Look for the tall grass on the cliff, and instead of going up the cliff, go left to the side of the cliff. A rock blocks your path, but can be moved by eating a sandwich. Bomb the crack behind the two treasure chest to reveal Burly Bear.

Chicken

Power: Increases defense, agility, and strength (+1 Strength, +1 Agility, +1 Defense)

Location: Flooded Temple

In the first dry area, dig at the X sign marked before the two fish statues.

Cardinal

Power: Increase chances of finding secret items

Location: Industrial Castle

Beat the Brute at the top floor of the castle.

Dragon Head

Power: Occasionally shoots fire

Location: Insane Store

Buy in store for 5500 gold.

Frogglet

Power: Frogglet’s catches items with its tongue

Location: Marsh

Find the X halfway in the first graveyard, where you’ll see a crypt.

Giraffey

Power: Increases leveling rate

Location: Desert

Look for the X in the sand towards the end of the level.

Hawkster

Power: Attacks enemies on the ground and picks up fruit from them

Location: Tall Grass Field

Before getting the animal Rammy from the bear with the banner, Hawkster can be found by blowing the horn outside the huts.

Install Ball

Power: Shoots enemies with his photons

Location: Alien Ship

Play through until the countdown begins. Shoot the mechanism that destroys the first green laser gate (after the toilet) and head straight up. There’s a door there (hard to see what with it being dark etc). Go left slightly. It’s still possible to exit the ship before the countdown ends.

Meowburt

Power: Increases agility (+3 Agility)

Location: Parade

The cat Meowburt is in a tunnel after the level Parade. Enter the level following Parade, and when the level begins, head to the left for the tunnel.

Monkeyface

Power: Increases the chance of finding secret items

Location: Church Store

Buy in store for 750 gold.

Mr. Buddy

Power: Increase rate of digging

Location: Home Castle

Find a X on a straw pile near the back wall in the first room of the castle.

Owlet

Power: Exposes hidden fruit in trees

Location: Forest Entrance

Repeatedly attack behind the area infested with vegetation before the Deadland exit.

Paazo

Power: Points out the location of buried treasure

Location: Snow Store

Buy in the store for 750 gold.

Pelter

Power: Occasionally shoots ice

Location: Insane Store

Buy in store for 5500 gold.

Piggy

Power: Increases the amount of health restored when eating food

Location: Swamp Village Store

Buy in store for 585 gold.

Rammy

Power: Rams the enemies down to the ground

Location: Tall Grass Field

Look for a bear with a banner.

Scratchpaw

Power: Increases agility and strength (+1 Strength, +2 Agility)

Location: Sandcastle Interior

Scratchpaw, a tiger, is behind the second barred window in the back of the room. Set him free by bombing the window.

Seahorse

Power: Increases speed in water

Location: Thieves Forest

Between the poo streak left by the deer and the river.

Sherbert

Power: Increases jump height

Location: Animal Ark

Eat a sandwich while standing under a door in the animal ark, then jump and press X, X, and Y button. Attack the door as it rises until you’re high enough to grab Sherbert.

Snailburt

Power: Increases defense but decreases agility (+5 Defense, -5 Agility)

Location: Marsh

Near the end of the level.

Snoot

Power: Increases strength (+2 Strength)

Location: Cyclop’s Fortress

In the first room of the fortress, find a crack in the wall and bomb it.

Spiny

Power: Increases defense (+2 Defense)

Location: Buy in store for 680 gold

Troll

Power: Health is slowly restored over time

Location: Thieves Forest

The troll is behind a wall that can be destroyed with three bombs.

Yeti

Power: Immunity against being frozen

Location: Snow World

The Yeti is behind a hut on a declining ramp.

Zebra

Power: Exposes food in the grass

Location: Desert Chase

The Zebra is carried by the rider on a camel, who runs away from you in the desert. Chase the rider and knock him off with an arrow to score the Zebra.