Der Nerdery

I was thinking about all you poor people out there who refuse to read the Harry Potter books, yet will sit down and watch the movies. You miss so much that way that I thought I should let you know what you are missing. This post will be on the first book and movie of Harry Potter and the Sorcerers Stone. I will be telling you the Differences form the book point of view to the movie as the Book is the original. OK here I go…

First off Professor MC. Gonagall has black Hair not salt and pepper like in the movie, and wears very square glasses not round. MC. Gonagall, Hagred and Dumador talk for some length before leaving Harry with the Derslys, not just dumping him off like luggage. At duddlys Birthday harry had to cook bacon for his Birthday not ham and they could not eat at the table, that is where they put all the gifts. In the movie they had them on the counter and they ate at the table.

Harry’s eyes are green in the book and brown in the movie. Harry was supposed to be left at a babysitters not go to the Zoo a last minute change and Harry had to go also.

Dudly has a friend “Piers,” he also goes to the Zoo with them.
Now to the famous snake scene. Yes, Harry talks to the snake. however Dudlly and Piers fall into the tank when the glass dissipates. The snake says Thanksss, amigo not just thanksss and the glass never reappears trapping them in there.

The letter that came from Hogwarts was addressed in emerald green ink and Harry had it out of the envelope when it was taken away he just had not had time to unfold it and read it yet. It was after they received that first letter addressed to the cupboard under the stair that they decided to move harry to dudlys spare bedroom. The next letters were addressed to The Smallest Room. The third day Uncle Vernin slept on the doorstep to make sure Harry did not get to the letters before he did. Saturday they found twenty-four letters rolled inside of the eggs that were delivered that day. Sunday they went to a hotel where more letters were delivered. Monday was the day that Hagred showed up. When Hagred came knocking at the door he only knocked twice before the door fell in, not three times. Harry never hides from Hagred he findes him right away he never mistook Dudly for Harry. The gun that Vernin had, Hagred took it away, tied it in a knot and tossed it into the corner of the room, not just bending it up and the gun was never fired. The cake that Hagred brought for Harrys birthday was not misspelled. When Hagred lit the fire in the fire place he had his back to them they did not see him light it. After Hagred lights the fire he pulls sausages from his pocket and proceeds to cook them on the fire. Hagred’s umbrella is pink, and a bright pink at that. Dudlly gets the pigs tail when Vernin insults Dumbledore not when he eats the cake. Dudley never touches the cake.

Qurril shakes Harry’s hand at the leaky cauldron, he does not avoid it like it shows in the movie. To get to Diagon Ally, Hagred taps one brick three times not multipule bricks once. Gringotts is a snowey white building with burnished bronze doors. Vault door 713 dissapers completely not unlocking when the goblin touches it. Harry went into the Owl shop with Hagrid to get Hedwig. Harry tried many wands before finding one that worked. The wands that were not right did not explode anything they did nothing. When Harry had the right wand it shot red sparks out of it. Harry first met Malfoy at the robe shop in Diagon Ally.

When Hagred and Harry where done shoping they went back to the Dersily’s for another month before going to Hogwarts. Harry meats Ron like the movie says but Ron allready has Scabers. They did eat chocolate frogs on the train but none jumped away in fact no jumping was ever mentioned. Harry again meets Draco on the train, in the movie it was not till later that he meets him. Professer McGonicle does not put the sorting hat on the kids they do that themselves. A student named Hannah Abbot was the first to put the hat on not Hermonie. Dumbalore’s welcoming speech goes as follows “nitwit, blubber, oddment, tweek.” Dumbadore gave the speach, they had him say it first in the movie before supper not after. Then they sing the School song pg.128 if you are interested in looking it up. It’s too long to put on here.

You also get to meet Peeves the Poltrigist, who is never mentioned in the movie at all.
The fat lady in the portrait is wearing a pink dress in the book. The class History of Magic is taught by a ghost. Nevil gives himself boils in potions class. Harry reads the news about the break-in at Gringots in the News paper at Hagreds hut, not at mail call.

The rememberal is the size of a large marble not a tennis ball like it was shown in the movie. Nevil did break his wrist when he fell off his broom in flying class.  He actually broke his wrist when he was 20ft in the air, he did not do any crazy stunts or get caught by anything on the way down. Malfoy said that he would leave the remembral up a tree not on the roof. When Harry caught the remembral he was about a foot from hitting the ground, not right in front of a window. Malfoy challenged Harry to a duel but he never shows, instead he sent Filtch after him trying to get Harry into trouble. It is while running from Flilch that they discover the forbidden corridor (not a room). They desover Fluffy in the corridore.

Six owls had to carry in Harry’s Nimbus 2000 not just Hedwig. On Halloween they had live bats flying in the great hall. Harry and Ron acually locate the Troll in the girls bathroom, not realizing that is the one Hermonie is in they lock it. They hear Hermoni screaming and they go in to help her. Harry was hanging onto the Trolls neck the whole time and he was never dangling by one leg.

During the first Quiditch match no one was knocked out. The Weasly twins did try to help Harry onto their brooms, when his started to go crazy, but they could not get close enough to him. Hermoni knocked over Querril trying to get to Snape. She set Snape’s robes on fire with a blue fire. Hermoni then put the blue fire into a jar then her pocket when everyone started to freak out. Harry was the only Seeker after the snitch when he caught it in his mouth.

Wizards chess pieces talk to the players. The Invisibility cloak is silvery gray. When Harry looks into the Mirror of Ersied he sees his entire family not just his Mom and Dad (Aunts, Uncles and Cousins ). Harry took Ron to see the mirror the next night not the same night. The Invisibility cloak also has a hood like a proper cloak should.

Malfoy stuck Nevels legs together with a leg locker curse, he torments Nevel a lot in the book. Harry found Nickolas Famels name on the back of a chocolate frog card, and that reminded Hermonie that she had the book. Harry heard Snape and Querril arguing in the forest not in the caste. Hagred put his Dragon egg directly into the fire not in a kettle above the fire. It took days for the dragon egg to hatch after the kids found out about it. Hagred ended up having Norbert for weeks after he hatched. Harry and Hermonie and Ron convinced Hagred to send Norbert to Charlie in Romania. Harry, Hermonie and Nevel were caught out after sending Norbert to Romania. Ron was not there and did not receive detention.

The party going into the forbidden forest was Hagred, Hermoni and Harry.
The other party was Malfoy, Nevel and Fang. They switched Harry and Nevil halfway through, becuse Malfoy would not stop scaring Nevil. Firenze a palomino cenatar rescued Harry from the cloaked figure. Harry was allowed to ride him back to Hagred.

When they went back to the forbidden corridor Fluffy was already awake. There was a harp there in the corridor but it was not playing. Harry played a flute that Hagrad had gave him. When they hit the devils snare Hermonie was not caught and she used a spell to get them both out, there was no relaxing to get out.

In the key room all the kids went after the keys, no keys chased them. The keys had colorful wings like birds not clear wings like bugs. The key they needed had blue wings. The chess pieces did not have faces. Ron got to choose what pieces they where going to play as. When they won, the white king took off his crown and threw it at Harry. The next room had a troll in it and the troll was already knocked out. The next room had potions on a table Hermoni helped Harry pick one and then went back to get help for Ron. Quirril tied Harry up with rope. Quirril could not touch Harry’s skin or it burned not just when Harry touched him. Voldemort never passed through Harry.

Again, these are just my observations I want in no way to put down the movies. I think that the movies were very well done and I realize that they only had so much time to work with. This is for those out there who refuse to read the books. I am hoping that this will show you the differences enough that you will want to go read them yourselves. I have left some of the minor differences out, feel free to post your comments below when you find them.

You’ve missed the last comic con in Seattle, and you had really planned on going to it, too. But don’t despair, not only are there other comic cons on the horizon, both near and far, but, in the interim, why not get yourself to a nice, intergalactic UFO con?

You Are Not Alone

2011 MUFON (Mutual Unidentified Flying Object Network) of Ohio Summer Conference is a con on the very near horizon, right behind that round saucer-looking thingy in the sky. With a conference title of “50 Years of Abduction Experience – Setting the Record Straight,” people are stampeding to get their plane tickets. It’s a one day conference, July 16, in Ashland, Ohio. This is the con that bills itself “REAL UFOs – the latest UFO videos and news,” featuring Travis Walton, “author of the famous abduction account ‘Fire in the Sky’ made into a blockbuster movie,” and Kathleen Marden, niece of Betty Hill, and author of the bestseller, “Captured! The Betty and Barney Hill UFO Experience.”

Or if that’s too soon, plan to go to the McMinnville UFO Festival next May, noted as “the second largest UFO Celebration in the Country,” held in an out-of-this-world venue, McMenamin’s Hotel Oregon. Here’s an event that offers the best of both worlds – or of many worlds. It starts off with an Alien UFO Costume Parade, followed by the Alien Pet Costume Contest. Getting those alien creatures to look like earth dogs is no easy task, but the festival participants are pretty successful at it.

The other bonus is that the McMinnville UFO celebration is held in the heart of Oregon’s wine country, so you can tour the many excellent wineries as well. No wonder the aliens landed here.

I-Con, Con You?

But if the UFO scene is too “spacy” for you, how about I-Con (aka: Island Convention) held in March at Stony Brook, New York, on the State University of New York campus. This is an eclectic convention including science fiction authors, Anime and other animation devotees, furry folks, gaming, SCA medieval participants, with various and sundry performances.

The first I-Con was held in 1982 with Gene Roddenberry as a GoH (guest of honor). How do you top that?

Finding Our Furry Friends

And now, for something completely different, how about a furry con? The attendees at a furry con focus on fictional anthropomorphic characters. The first furry convention, ConFurence, was held in California in 1990.

Many attendees at a furry con wear elaborate animal or animal-like costumes, usually of their own construction. Costumers play a major role at a furry con. Like most cons, attendees will find an art show, a masquerade – distinguished from walking through the halls by having a raised stage – discussions of the literature, movies, print and online fare of anthropomorphic stories and characters.

Boo!

And if all of the foregoing is not scary enough for you, why not go to a World Horror Convention? The next one will be held March 29 through April 1, 2012 in Salt Lake City, “At the Mountains of Madness.”

Salt flats for miles, now that’s scary! Here attendees rub elbows with famed horror writers and watch horror films, as well visit the dealer’s room, go to presentations and panels, as is usual for all cons. But horror Con-goers have the added advantage of getting to run about the halls in terrifying zombie, oozing, blood-dripping costuming. Fun will be had by all.

I Want My Comic-Con

But if you’re still pining for a full-on comic con, don’t despair. THE comic con of comic cons, the San Diego Comic-Con International, will be held July 21-24 at the San Diego Convention Center, Petco Park. With an attendance of 130,000 in 2010, it is billed as the fourth largest convention in the world. It’s still but a pale follower of Comiket, held in Tokyo, Japan twice a year in December and August, with an attendance of 520,000 in December 2010.

The San Diego Comic-com was originally all about comic books, but has expanded to include, somewhat logically, animation, anime, manga, horror, webcomics, fantasy novels, the burgeoning popularity of the illustrated novel, as well as the other pop culture components of video games, toys and collectible card games.

Probably the most intriguing aspect of the wealth of cons is that people from all walks of life, with greatly varying belief systems, political stances, cultural underpinnings and gender persuasions come together and play well together. Earthlings, take a clue!

Matthew Warren is a sci-fi fan, wanna-be astronomer and a programmer when not working on Gump Tees and Things Nerds Like.

No matter how awesome a show is, there’s always a character or two that bring out a collective groan whenever they (dis)grace the screen. Whether it’s saccharine kiddies or one-note Mary Sues, here are the ten characters of Star Trek viewers love to hate.

10) Neelix from Voyager.

Just so we’re clear, Neelix is the head chef on a star ship equipped with food replicators, and his creations are gag-worthy. He is nauseatingly cheerful and a buffoon. When he does manage to be serious, his smarmy recollections of family reek of insincerity. Half of what comes out of his mouth revolves around putrid leola root, the Great Forest, or jealous rage over Kes. The rest consists of shop-worn diatribes about grief, love, and perseverance.

9) T’Pol from Enterprise.

Look at Spock, Tuvok, Sarek, and Vorik. Tall. Angular. Lean. Giving off the impression of that impressive Vulcan strength. And then look at tiny little Jolene Blalock. No matter how high her heels or how exact her posture, nothing changes the fact that she looks incapable of delivering the Vulcan nerve pinch with any authority. Add in T’Pol’s incessant arguing for the first two seasons and her addiction to Trellium-D (Star Trek’s code word for crack) and you have one highly improbable and unbelievable ‘Vulcan’.

8.) Reg ‘Broccoli’ Barclay on Next Generation and Voyager.

Nervous, stammering, fearful, and reclusive. We’re supposed to believe this guy didn’t wash out at the Academy? While it is true that one, or perhaps even two, of these qualities would be tolerated in a promising student, but all four of them? I don’t buy it. Reg is a bungler who frequently embarrasses himself. While Dwight Schultz does the best he can with the role, it’s exhausting to watch him simper and cower.

7) Nurse Chapel from the original series.

Christine Chapel is a beautiful, educated woman who could have just about any single man on the Enterprise. So she sets her sights on… Spock? Yes. She longs for some Vulcan love, despite the fact they intentionally repress such emotions. Chapel even goes so far as to drug him with love potion crystals. Stalker or pathetic? You be the judge. Either way, ick.

6) Captain Archer on Enterprise.

Two words: Quantum Leap. If that isn’t bad enough, Scott Bacula also portrayed the gay neighbor of Lester Burnham in American Beauty. Anyone over the age of 25 is already going to have a hard time with the choice of actor. Add in characterization that makes the captain of the ship either a total tool or a moron, and you’re left with the worst leader to ever command any incarnation of the Enterprise.

5) Doctor Pulaski from Next Generation.

What you get when you put Bones in drag? Doctor Pulaski, the character designed to fill the shoes of Doctor Crusher due to the egress of Gate McFadden. Argumentative and dry as the Sahara, there wasn’t much the actress, Diana Muldaur, could do with the role. Fans were delighted when McFadden returned after suffering through an entire season of Pulaski.

4) Benjamin Sisko from DS9.

In a nutshell, Sisko is the Bajoran version of Jesus, but with a baseball fetish. While this may sound hilarious, it is the entertainment equivalent of watching paint dry. The dream sequences and ‘visions’ go on and on, boring the viewer. Faith is a touchy subject. Sci-fi should never be religion-fi, and the line is crossed far too often with Sisko.

3) Chakotay from Voyager.

Robert Beltran hated this character so much, he tried unsuccessfully to have himself written out on at least one occasion. The character is a mix-and-match of different American Indian cultures, and is embarrassed repeatedly by his ex-lover Seska. Once the Maquis settle down into life on Voyager, Chakotay is reduced to being Janeway’s yes-man. Beltran broods very well, and you can tell he despises the role. It just doesn’t work for him.

2) Pavel Chekov from the original series.

With his inaccurate Russian accent, Chekov was added to the series primarily because he resembled then-heartthrob Davy Jones of The Monkees. Unfortunately, the writers chose to leave Walter Koenig omnipresent but largely useless on the bridge every episode.

1) Wesley Crusher on Next Generation.

Poor Wil Wheaton. What did he ever do to deserve this? Wesley Crusher, boy genius, is socially backwards with his peers but is ingratiating and charming to all the adults- even the ones who profess to hate children. Wesley is just so ‘spesh-ul’, no one but the viewers can resist him! Fans found him nauseating and there is even a Facebook group entitled “Wesley Crusher Must Die!”.

Matthew Warren is a sci-fi fan, wanna-be astronomer and a programmer by day. While not working on Gump Tees and Things Nerds Like he spends time with his two beautiful daughters.

A long time ago, in a broadcast booth far far away… (1981 to be exact) a science fiction novelist named Brian Daley, a director for National Public Radio(NPR) named John Philip Madden, a sound engineer named Tom Voegeli and a cast including Mark Hamill and Anthony Daniels recreated the magic of the original Star Wars for broadcast around the nation on NPR.

The big question is why would anyone want to listen to a audio only version of the story when the movie was so full of stunning visuals?  Brian Daley, the writer who with full blessing of George Lucas adapted the story adding many lost details.  The story starts many days before Princess Leia’s “diplomatic mission to Alderaan”, but I’m not going to ruin all the details of the beginning, but  it mostly deals with the start of the Rebel Alliance.  Also included in the radio drama are scenes that were deleted in the making of the movie but ended up in George Lucas’ novelization of the move.

Added to the dramatization is the iconic music from John Williams and the amazing sound effects created by Ben Burtt for the original movie.  When you’ve seen the movies as many times as I’ve had, you don’t even need visuals, you can see all the action in your head.

There are some draw backs,  while Bernard Behrens voice could easily be mistaken as Alec Guinness for Obi-Wan Kenobi, but Ann Sachs as Leia and Perry King as Han Solo are quite different.  Actually King gave a different personality and delivery to Solo that was different, but still believable than that of Harrison Ford. (Still hard to tell in the scene with Greedo “who shot first without seeing it”)

Another draw back is that many action scene were much shorter duration then in the movies and dialogue is really drawn out.  So the pacing is quite different  when a quick conversation from the movies turns into a couple minute discussion and iconic scenes are breezed over in a couple words.

In 1983 the cast reunited to make The Empire Strikes Back including the famous John Lithglow to play a very convincing Yoda and Billy Dee Williams reprising his role.  Unfortunately there is not as much story added as the adaptation was taken almost exclusively from the movie.

When it was time to create Return of the Jedi, NPR was in a financial problems, and it was until 1996 that funding was secured.  Despite the long gap in time, most of the same team finished the trilogy, with the exception of Mark Hamill who was busy at the time and was replaced with Joshua Fardon.

It may not be that extended version of Star Wars your hoping to see on the Big Screen, but it one of the greatest radio dramas ever produced.  Just proving that a great story can transcend any medium.  Oh and do not worry if you’ve missed hearing it on the radio:   HighBridge Audio has published all three episodes as Audio Books so you can listen to them when ever you want.  The only catch is they can be expensive to buy.

Last weekend, I was bored. Bored of Halo: Reach, bored of Castlevania: Symphony of the Night. I was even bored of the internet. I started browsing instant watch movies on Netflix, when I saw a jewel long lost from my childhood:

Toxic Crusaders: The Movie.

Well, actually, no. Ignore what the picture shows. And it’s not really a movie. Toxic Crusaders was a cartoon released in the mid-90s. It is a spinoff of a cult “classic” series called Toxic Avenger. If you have never heard of these films, you make me dissapoint. Actually, I am jealous of you. The studio that made Toxic Avenger, Troma Inc.,  is the king of dog shit movies. Yes yes, I am glad there is at least one guerrilla movie studio who doesn’t follow the traditions or regulations of the film industry. Believe me: it shows. Excessive violence, nudity, and enough cheese to drown Wisconsin. I really have no problem with Toxic Avenger or its many…interesting…. sequels. It’s supposed to be corny. However, every Troma film seems to want to live up to Toxic Avenger, making most (if not all) their movies in the category of most 2d fighters that came after Street Fighter, commonly known as Me-Toos.

So I digressed. Toxic Crusaders is a PG spin-off of said movie series. How much of a spin-off? Well, like Me-Toos, Toxic Crusaders tried to capitalize on the kick of other series of 1991 concerning the environment and super mutants. Maybe you heard of the other shows like Captain Planet and Zen: Intergalactic Ninja? Or maybe their biggest inspiration: Teenage Mutant Something Somethings.  Actaully Zen: Interg’l Ninja was a video game and a comic book. Maybe MC Kids on the Sega Genesis? No? Was I the only one?!

Anyway, this uber nerd named Melvin Junko who gets dipped in toxic waste and becomes Toxie: a hideously deformed creature of superhuman size and strength. He then confronts this alien pollutant villain named Dr. Killemoff. Along the way, Toxie enlists of other hideously deformed creatures of superhuman size and strength Major Disaster, Nozone, Junkyard, and Headbanger. The show had 13 episodes, three or so of which have been pasted together as a movie on Netflix, and never really found a spot on Fox or syndication.

This is where the nerding happens. I remember this cartoon. To be honest, this cartoon affected a lot of my character design then and even now. Yes, it’s a dumbed down version of a terrible movie BUT the designs were amazing for a prepubescent kid like me. Even better: Playmates, the designers for those Adolescent Abomination Anthropomorphic Amphibians (I was afraid I wasn’t going to keep that one rolling) made the toys. I even recall wanting these toys, as a sort of poor-man’s Turtles action figures.

As I watched the “movie,” I realized just how marketed this cartoon was to the toys. Seeing vehicles, I thought: yep, those became toys. I saw the disposable henchmen and thought yep, those are action figures. If you really go back and watch any cartoons of this formula (most super hero action cartoons, honestly) you will see what they wanted as toys and what they were pushing was revenue from toys, along with cereals and other merchandise. Hell’s Bells: they even had video games from Bandai (makers of notoriously games of obscure and random franchises) and  the Me-Too Sega Genesis.

I actually rented this game from a Hastings. It was… well… I have played better. A lot better. It wasn’t quite TMNT: The Arcade game, nor was it Final Fight or Streets of Rage or even Treasure Troll’s Treasure Island or Pretty Princess Dress-Me-Up. Jerky controls, terrible hit detection, no bump mapping or browning or bloom. Dog. Shit. Tacos. The music was actually okay from what I remember the music was dog shit tacos as well I am torn on this subject after going to Youtube.

Collectively, this series tried really hard to be a poor man’s TMNT. Mutants, dumb villains, and merchandise. Watching it now, I was able to see the undertones and what they were peddling. As an animator… I was butthurt. I could see where they took shortcuts, and where they made embarrassing animation boo-boos (wrong characters doing dialogue). I feel like they had a very finite budget and they couldn’t waste too much time on the inbetweens to make it quality. Some of the writing was chuckle-worthy, but most are definitive Derp jokes (jokes you can see coming from space, see: any Rob Schneider movie). One character, Psycho, pretty much gives you a rundown on what is going to happen at the episode’s climax. I thought that was clever. Oh, and get used to hearing “hideously deformed creature of superhuman size and strength.” They try to say it at least twice an episode, if not more.

So my childhood may have been mislead, but if you want some nostalgia from a cartoon that just couldn’t make it or if you can’t find your Ninja Turtle collection, I would recommend this series…sort of.

Two donkeys of five.

Nerd Rating:10/10

The Sorcerer’s Apprentice was a nerds dream come true it starts out with a Buzz Light year alarm clock, and it just gets better from there. They could not have made Dave anymore of a nerd. A true nerd had definitely had a hand in making this movie. With the reference to star wars and the MTG poster on the wall, yes only a nerd would notice that.The movie has everything You could ever want from high speed car chases, sword fights, cool Gadgets, magic, flying metal eagles, dragons, explosions, Nicolas Cage in a leather duster…sigh. what more can a girl ask for? Jay Baruchel is pretty cute himself (in a geeky way). For u guys don’t worry there is two good looking woman for you Teresa Palmer and Monica Bellucci. The effects were mind blowing I have never seen magic portrayed so well before, Disney knows how to do it. The movie keeps your full attention for the entire film so do everything Before u go to see it, I would recommend this movie to everyone, because If you are a nerd or not u will still love this movie. I personally Can’t wait to go see the movie again.

SPOILER ALERT!!!!!
If u don’t want to hear about my favorite parts of the movie don’t
Continue to read……

I warned you….

I love it when they changed their cars to sport cars. I really Wish I had that talent. It would come in handy when I’m late for work especially when they drove a car through one, and to get out they had to drive back through their reflection, of course the only reflection was a piece of glass that was falling and they had to drive through before it broke. The persian sinking rug was awesome just think u have a unwelcome guest… not anymore the rug just swallowed them. Tesla coils anyone? what isn’t nerdy about that but oh so cool at the same time expesually when he can make them play music. The loved the part in the movie when he tries to explain his behavior to Becky and explains away his odd behavior at the age of ten with a glucose imbalance it just cracked me up. glucose imbalance really? like I haven’t heard that one before. Ok so maybe I haven’t which is why I love it so much I’ve never heard or seen anything like this in the movies in a very long time. the fact that all the good guys made it out of the movie alive was refreshing.